Dec. 13th, 2007
WHY must you make me kill you with fire?  
It should come as no surprise to any of you: I hate sales calls. Nothing makes me more stabby. I understand your only job is to call me (apparently), but believe it or not, *I* actually have work to do!

At work they're the worst because invariably it's some asshat who won't take NO for an answer and who also apparently thinks that I just got an internet yesterday ("Hi, have you heard of the Google 'cause my company can put you there!") diaf *stab**stab**stab*.

You get 20 of these a day, and you'd hate you as much as I hate you. Today I got a 1:13 long voice mail that got in "We are one of the leading..." before I hit 9 to delete.

No... No, Tom, you are not. I can tell you what you are not: you are not leading anything. You know how I know, because if you have to tell me then you aren't. Leading companies don't have to tell me they're leading. You know who doesn't cold call me to tell me that, Tom? Microsoft, Google, Yahoo... you know, LEADING COMPANIES. I call them. If you're leading, I should have heard about you, and I should be calling you!


But wait... there's MOAR.

As I was typing this, he actually sent me a nonsensical email follow up... twice. AND HIGH PRIORITY, which just makes me want to stick toothpicks with little flags on them into in your eyes and then light them on fire. Yes, I read your email first, and I also deleted it because YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND EMAIL FLAGGING YOU TWITMONKEY I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!

I made this FAIL image macro just for you, Tom! plschokeanddiekthxbi!

Go directly to FAIL

So how's everyone?

Mood: verily caffeinated
( Post a new comment )
(no subject) - (Anonymous) on December 14th, 2007 - 01:26 am
The People's Exhibit Adavidology on December 14th, 2007 - 08:06 pm
oh, i wish i could do that. i have to be professional.

although, i did one time totally school this guy who sent me a high priority email. sent him a passive aggressive bitch slap: "sorry not interested, and oh btw, please check your email settings. I think you inadvertently sent your sales inquiry high priority. i don't particularly need those forwarded to my mobile."

*stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab*
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Davidthisisdavid on December 14th, 2007 - 01:35 am
Yup. One called me like 20 minutes ago from the cable company asking me why I don't take the Cox (our company down here) combo and get phone too. I was at Kinkos printing something out and said "Bitch, I'm paying for this computer by the minute so call back some other time." Well, I didn't say bitch, but I did tell him to call back some other time- in which case I'll recognize the number and not answer it at all. Fuckers.
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dhruv_dhody: nastydhruv_dhody on December 14th, 2007 - 01:58 am
Telemarketers are bad!
Now imagine them talking to you in chinese when u keep telling them that u dont understand a word!
Thats my life!
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Davidthisisdavid on December 14th, 2007 - 07:03 pm
Just wondering, but, what do you do in China?
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dhruv_dhodydhruv_dhody on December 15th, 2007 - 03:13 am
Re: Hi
am working for Chinese telecommunication company! :p
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Davidthisisdavid on December 15th, 2007 - 03:34 am
Re: Hi
Cool, I'm moving to Taiwan soon! :)
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(no subject) - (Anonymous) on December 16th, 2007 - 03:41 am
dhruv_dhody: Nooo!dhruv_dhody on December 17th, 2007 - 02:12 am
Re: Hi
No! they have a couple!
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D a y s p r i n g: me-bwsextypeboy on December 14th, 2007 - 02:59 am
Heh, you are always very entertaining.

And, I completely agree! =)
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james__sndchasr on December 14th, 2007 - 03:08 am
I get those call for those asking if I want to renew. I never got it to start with!
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