The People's Exhibit A (davidology) wrote,
The People's Exhibit A
davidology

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TiVo! What's happened to us?!

You should've been recording the new Family Guy yesterday, but the cable box defied your instructions (yet again) and failed to change the channel.

That was bad.

What was worse was what you recorded: something on Country Music Television?!!11 That means, of course, that you were recording something on that station before trying to get Family Guy.

Now, I know I must take part of the blame. After repeating Guided Setup, it's my responsibility to delete all sports, foreign language, and country music stations from your listings. I somehow missed one. But how?! How could you not know me after all these years?

Painfully I pulled up your love notes to me, "TiVo's Suggestions," hoping to see there was some huge error. Maybe you thought that channel was something else? I wanted to believe, but it was too much to hope for. Tears welled up in my eyes as I hysterically hit the red DO NOT WANT button. I must've pressed it 10 times as you complained "BONG! BONG! BONG!" as though I were hurting you. I wanted to hurt you. How could you do this to me?!

After all of these years, I thought you knew me! I thought we had something special!

I'm scared to pull up your suggestions now—afraid I'll find you've been watching college baseball. Or worse: Country music festival college baseball hosted by Dr. Phil in Mandarin.

I don't know. I just... I just need to be alone for a little while. It's like there's a stranger in my bedroom now. It's best we not speak for a while.

 
Tags: geek, pub, tivo
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