The People's Exhibit A (davidology) wrote,
The People's Exhibit A
davidology

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Happy Single Awareness Day / Valentine's Day!

So I enjoy joking about VDay, but I never really understood why so many people seem to really get depressed by it. I mean like, full on, pop-a-Proazac or take-Ambiens-all-day-to-stay-asleep depressed. The marketing department of FTD has everyone so well trained!

At the office is probably where it's the most amusing though. On the one side you people try to outdo each other at the office spending retarded amounts of money on weeds that are going to die 2 days later. Most of them probably ordered for them themselves or by telling their significant others what they expected them to send. Then on the other, you have to listen to everyone else bitch about the bouquets of flowers people are getting that are too big to even carry. You humans are silly creatures.

Personally, a single, red rose (given unprompted) is by far more sweet than a bouquet of bee magnets I will invariably manage to kill 10 minutes later. Now, a gift box with something kinky inside would be hot.

But for those of us who are single, there's no need to get all upset. There's always dirty stripper night at Micky's!

 
Tags: holidays
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