Previous | Mem | Next
 
The People's Exhibit A
davidology
Apr. 20th, 2004
The second cumming - God rox0rs my sox0rs.  
So I was thinking, if Jesus is the son of God because God's baby mama Mary was outside spread eagle when God rained down supreme sperm, who's to say I'm not the son of God too, right?

Problem is, Jesus had a dozen sycophant yes-men running around singing his praises and writing books and shit. I don't have that, so I'm going to need more proof than an old book filled with a bunch of contradictory stories that some douche bag called the word of god, right? So I need someone who goes to church to get me one of those Christ Crackers so I can get a DNA sample.

But if I do turn out to be the son of God, seriously, party at my pad. And if you're good, maybe I'll let you lie on my bed, bite the pillow, and I'll show you God.

yeeaaaaa

The gospel according to Davidology.
 
 
Mood: blasphemously hyper
Listening to: Pink Floyd - A Great Day for Freedom
 
Posted by The People's Exhibit A at 06:36 pm | Permalink | 23 comments | Leave a comment
 
( Post a new comment )
Milambermilamberrex on April 20th, 2004 - 06:49 pm
LOL -- if it helps, my dad is a minister, so i can get ya all kind of christian crackers and grape juice ;P
(Reply) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit Adavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 11:01 am
What?! It's grape juice? Not even real wine?

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Gantriochgantrioch on April 21st, 2004 - 11:10 am
Protestants can't afford real wine.

;-).
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Milambermilamberrex on April 21st, 2004 - 11:17 am
grape juice is used often in protestant churches, but it really depends on the denomination and their beliefs on alchohol. even churches that serve wine has to have a selection of grape juice communion due to the possibility of recovering alcoholics.

now that i have demonstrated that i know way too much about this subject, can i just proclaim you as a god in your own right? ;) i'm really good at worshipping ;P
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit A: AbFab - Edwinadavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 06:37 pm
of course. But no autographs, please. I only have 7 6 days to fix this place up.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Milambermilamberrex on April 21st, 2004 - 07:40 pm
please. if he did it in six days with a seventh day of rest, you should be able to do it faster than that.

as to autographs, been there, done that. so, i'm over it.

your brush with blasphemy almost has me tempted to post a certain blasphemous pic in my journal, but I think I will not tempt the hate mail!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit A: burns - evildavidology on April 22nd, 2004 - 05:10 pm
meh... anyone who takes their religion so seriously as to send hate mail deserves the anxiety and anger that was produced. I doubt "God" is so pathetic as to be offended by pictures or words.

I say, bring on the blasphemy! It's rather healing.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Jaimieobsidian_heart on April 20th, 2004 - 07:06 pm
Fuck yes...
"And if you're good, maybe I'll let you lie on my bed, bite the pillow, and I'll show you God."

That just made me randy. Hott.
(Reply) (Thread) (Link)
billyboy15 on April 20th, 2004 - 08:25 pm
Re: Fuck yes...
For real, yo.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Briancornandmilk on April 20th, 2004 - 10:59 pm
Re: Fuck yes...
AWESOME.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
brett brettersonsomthingscatchy on April 21st, 2004 - 03:14 am
Re: Fuck yes...
i love you.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
billyboy15 on April 21st, 2004 - 10:29 am
Re: Fuck yes...
Haha. But really, who doesn't love Margaret Cho.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit A: geekdavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 11:02 am
Re: Fuck yes...
Everyone loves the Cho
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit A: geekdavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 11:10 am
Re: Fuck yes...
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
billyboy15 on April 21st, 2004 - 11:54 am
Re: Fuck yes...
Witty and cute. What a rarity.


Actually, that mix is about a dime a dozen, but I'm still gonna add you as a friend.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit Adavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 01:15 pm
Re: Fuck yes...
It is? I think I'm going to the wrong clubs.

added ya bacK!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Gres02gres02 on April 20th, 2004 - 08:19 pm
I'll run around and yell your praises! This is definately worth a link in my site! :-)
(Reply) (Thread) (Link)
ex_prezrober685 on April 21st, 2004 - 09:56 am
You were right, this was pretty damn funny.

Especially that last part...
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit A: geekdavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 11:03 am
:honored:

I do love good blasphemy. I find it oddly cathartic.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Rectangle! America! Dumpster!marinade on April 20th, 2004 - 08:46 pm
fyi - technically, Mary was begotten the same way as Jesus - which would make her a heavenly creation free of sin (her mother was a saint or something). And, Lordy (no pun intended) you raised more than my eyebrows.

Don't be afraid, I'm a gentle stalker.
(Reply) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit A: geekdavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 11:07 am
I think Mary did the nasty out of wedlock, got knocked up and didn't want to bring shame upon her family.

"You can be a whore or mother of God. Take your pick."

Personally, I'd have gone for whore. More fun. Seriously, if you're going to have connections to God, what's the fun if you can't use it to meet guys?
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)
Matt Mutchmorematmutchmr on April 21st, 2004 - 07:55 am
As a child, I ate some communion wafers and got sick and threw them up.

Apparently God decided to forsake me, even as a youngster.
(Reply) (Thread) (Link)
The People's Exhibit Adavidology on April 21st, 2004 - 11:08 am
Maybe God chips had salmonella?
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread) (Link)