Jun. 6th, 2005
Things that are retarded  
  • Why does the day of the week start on Sunday? Honestly, what asshat came up with that idea? Clearly it makes more sense for the week to start on MONDAY. Why should I have to change the default on everything I own because someone thinks it cool to perpetuate this lunacy?

  • Why are we still using the imperial system of measurement? Shouldn't that have gone the way of the cart and buggy? Using centimeters over inches will certainly make everyone on gay.com much happier (19 cm sounds a lot better than 7.5", right?)

  • What's with this am/pm nonsense? Isn't the human brain capable of comprehending 24 hours? Drop the am/pm nonsense, and you solve so many things: (1) your alarm clock will never be set 12 hours wrong again; (2) clock manufacturers don't have to put in AM/PM indicators; (3) clocks will never again incorrectly indicate "12:00 pm" (as I'm sure your grammar teacher has told you, there is not such thing as 12 pm); (4) no one will ever again correct you for saying "12 pm" or "12 am."
  • Why does the U.S. list dates as Month/Day/Year, and the Europeans list it as Day/Month/Year?! They're both fucking retarded. Unless you read right to left or stick your head up your ass to put your pants on, it should be Year/Month/Day. More significant digits to the left. Add in time to the U.S. or Euro formats, and you have chaos! CHAOS!
    MM DD YY HH MM SS?!? What kind of order is that?! Clearly, it should be:
    YYYY[delimiter]MM[delimiter]DD[delimiter]HH[delimiter]MM[delimiter]SS.

  • Why doesn't our vending machine have Diet Coke with Splenda Crack yet but still has the ones with cancer/tumor/extra head-growing/turn-your-prostate-blue aspartame?

  • Why do pro-lifers insist on inflicting their views on everyone else? If you don't believe in abortion, don't have one. If you don't like homosexual marriage, don't have one. If you don't like stem cells, move to a farm in Pennsylvania, stick leeches on your back everytime you get sick, and leave the rest of us the alone!

  • And lastly why... WHY hasn't the human race been dominated by a horde of huge elephant robot puppets yet?

Ohhhh... if I'm ever elected supreme being, I will fix all of this.
Tags:
 
 
Mood: hyper
Listening to: The Starting Line - Playing Favorites
 
 
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Gantriochgantrioch on June 7th, 2005 - 12:35 am
The year stays the same for the longest so it makes sense to put it last. You should know what year you're in. The day-first system is best because the day changes ... um ... daily.

Aspartame does not cause cancer! Bad David.

Don't bash my state! At least we didn't ban traditional foie gras or try to ban water! Crazy Californians.

Hehe.
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The People's Exhibit Adavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 12:41 am
You can always use shorthand and omit the year. That's not the point! It's still the larger unit which should go first. You would never list seconds before hours. It's MADNESS! Consistency is order. Order is sanity.

My PA reference was only for those silly quakers and their medieval ways. You know I love the rest of you in that lovely blue (albeit cold) state of yours.

And don't talk to us about water, or we'll take yours too!
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Gantriochgantrioch on June 7th, 2005 - 12:45 am
Gimme a drink of dihydrogen monoxide.
Ben and I were talking about how you'd die from the weather in the northeast ;-).

California didn't want water, it wanted to ban it!
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The People's Exhibit A: hyperdavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 05:12 am
Re: Gimme a drink of dihydrogen monoxide.
we have standards. Besides, Colorado is already our water bitch. Don't drink the hatorade.
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The People's Exhibit A: hyperdavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 12:49 am
oh, and i've heard terrible, awful things about aspartame. I'm strictly a Splenda guy now. Have you tasted it? You'll be hooked. HOOKED! It's awesome. I'm going to start putting it in everything. In fact, I might just do lines of it off a hooker's chest.
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Gantriochgantrioch on June 7th, 2005 - 12:56 am
Those people who bad-mouth aspartame are the same type of people who I fail in organic laboratory. Non-majors organic laboratory. Ugh.

They need to go read some reliable, sound papers on the subject.

And before anyone else says it, saccharin is safe as well.

Splenda is fine for what it is. Actually, they changed Pepsi One so it's now sucralose and acesulfame potassium.
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The People's Exhibit Adavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 05:08 am
The last source I heard it from was a friend who knows the former head of CNN. He doesn't allow the stuff in his home under any circumstances. He said, "If you saw even half the reports we weren't allowed to run, you'd never drink a sip of that stuff."

So I dunno... I've grown rather accustomed to my prostate. I don't want to harm him!

But... splenda... well, i heart splenda.


Splenda is crack
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nx01deevolution on June 7th, 2005 - 12:41 am
i forgot about that icon.

you look like a non-coporeal life form of some sort.
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The People's Exhibit Adavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 12:43 am
you made it :)
I'd get home a lot faster if I were.
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nx01deevolution on June 7th, 2005 - 01:43 am
Re: you made it :)
whatever it takes.
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The People's Exhibit Adavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 05:09 am
Re: you made it :)
i know i can make it through.
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Brentmamabrent on June 7th, 2005 - 01:52 am
The elephant and its cousins are amazing. Fine rant, by the way. But kudos on the elephant. :)
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The People's Exhibit Adavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 01:57 am
Thanks... I always say, "Come for the rants, but stay for the elephant."
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It Starts Up North In Hollywood...fivebyfive on June 7th, 2005 - 02:21 am
Promises, promises.
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Matthew: pantiesmattachu on June 7th, 2005 - 03:48 am
that icon is GREAT! lol
one of the best movies ever!
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Brentmamabrent on June 7th, 2005 - 04:23 am
Thanks, dear! So happy you know it. I was just reminiscing this very evening about my night out many years ago with my fellow Cluesters. The ensemble Halloween costume is great fun, but Peacock makes for fab solo drag anytime!
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eviltickles on June 7th, 2005 - 03:37 am
why do people still sell you caffeine?!
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driftwoodsun on June 7th, 2005 - 07:10 am
You'd better.
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東西南北tongsinanpei on June 7th, 2005 - 08:56 am
Easy...
That said, the elephant is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while.
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toenail: brainycuriousgeorgecu on June 7th, 2005 - 12:03 pm
I love Splenda, but apparently it chlorinates your DNA. So, in a sense, it still is the same as your cancer/tumor/extra head-growing/turn-your-prostate-blue aspartame. Only, it does it slower and in a more insidious way.
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The People's Exhibit Adavidology on June 7th, 2005 - 04:41 pm
BLASPHEMY!
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vwjustinvwjustin on June 7th, 2005 - 11:55 pm
Fix it now!
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